Recent Posts - page 2
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things i hide from my roman catholic parents
by titty.tino This one is for my strict parent besties out there. Even though I’m now a senior in college and I live pretty much full time up here, my parents’ rules and regulations can still keep me up… Read More ›
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wilt: don’t cheap out on an airbnb
by zachmoss It was cold (and dark). The kinda cold that grips you as you walk outside and screams in your face immediately making you forget whatever you were thinking about. The kinda cold that really makes you wanna not… Read More ›
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campus buildings as alcoholic beverages
by cumslut & krog Innovation & Discovery: Blue Raspberry Svedka This one’s for all my people that had to take gen chem or orgo in this godforsaken building. The sheer amount of trauma stored within these walls is so potent… Read More ›
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the wild world of weed words
by m477r1c3 some words for weed are good. some words for weed are bad. here are my thoughts on the matter. acceptable: weed marijuana reefer ganja zigzag sploofy mary jane bud homunculus flower zlonkert homunculoid secretariat (the horse)… Read More ›
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an ode to the drunk people outside my attic window
by sophiewolfe The beginning of November marks the occasion that I finally close my bedroom window and accept that it is no longer a feasible option to ‘let some air in’, though that is what my Jane Austen ass instincts… Read More ›
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ranking my top songs of the last 7 years
by izzybee I have been a proud Spotify Premium member for the last 7 years, so yeah, you can say I’m kind of better than most people. Granted, my parents still pay for my account (Hi mom and dad!), but… Read More ›
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make pokemon go cool again
by dardarbinks Remember the dude who wrote the song, “I play Pokemon Go every day?” Yeah, I am him, and he is I., and now, I’m officially unveiling my secret life as a Pokemon addict. I have two phones. One… Read More ›
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emt dinner
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jake from state farm is NOT a good neighbor
by peniskreamer LOS ANGELES, CA — On November 2nd, Jake from State Farm entered the Denny’s on Figueroa Street. He reportedly walked in “jangling” and was quickly given a table. He ordered over fifty dollars worth of food, including… Read More ›
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a letter to my 13-year-old self
by izzybee Dear 13-year-old self, Hi. It’s me. You, but 5 years and some change older. Just wanted to write to you, now that we have the grace and separation of over half a decade between us. A few updates… Read More ›
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online exclusive ›
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pregame push-up challenge (online exclusive)
November 14, 2023
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online exclusive uncensored version of my father’s penis (drivers license cover)
November 14, 2023
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halloween hate mail (online exclusive)
October 31, 2023
Vol 27 ›
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mid-semester slump
November 14, 2023
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the athletic amphitheater is a portal to an alternate universe
November 14, 2023
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news in brief
November 14, 2023
vol 26 ›
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hearing funny sounds? there are bugs in your walls they’re in your walls get them out get them
March 26, 2023
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jack and the beanstalk: the magic power of beans
March 26, 2023
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how uvm animals beat the cold
March 26, 2023