by dorkin I walk slowly. My legs are short-ish, but I don’t make up for the difference with a quick pace or longer stride, I just remain in the back of the pack. It is an affliction that I grew… Read More ›
reflections
pov: 8 months in!
by lucy&emma Congratulations are in order! Emma and I have been courting for 8 months! Recently, we were reminiscing on our favorite memories together. Some being cute dates like flower and pumpkin picking and some more embarrassing moments like getting… Read More ›
salem witch stupidity
by mattmcgotty There comes a moment in most American students career where they learn the word “crucible,” a time in which they read the 1953 play of the very same name, because where else would someone hear such a stupid… Read More ›
it is goblin season
goblingoblin As the winds grow colder, and the leaves leavethe trees, I simply say, “nyeh!”. This fall is GoblinSeason!!!! Don’t be the only one in your friendgroup without a Magnanimous Treasure, or aColossal Hoard, with Coins and Plunder aplenty.Everybody Wants… Read More ›
my boobs are better than yours!
by danalavender Boobs. Breasts. Titties, even. Since the dawn of humanity, the Universe hath bestowed upon us these nippley, warm flesh bags. And since the dawn of my consciousness, I have craved them. On me. My chest. Attached to me…… Read More ›
central dining sucks
by heinuswanus Picture this: you just finished an hour and fifteen minute long class and you are now feeling starved and ready to munch some mediocre food from none other than the central campus dining hall. You stand in line… Read More ›
general complaints
by katlipari “Wow Kat, another listicle… how brave” ok shut up let me live. I would like toattribute this article to a tweet I saw from @chunkbardey “wish i didn’t love tocomplain but unfortunately i’m just really good at it…. Read More ›
nobody knows anything anymore
by katlipari Most people think they are smart, they are not. I amcurrently employed at a place that I enjoy working at soI will be as vague as possible while also being specificabout these interactions. I may or may not… Read More ›
i thought foo fighters were the biggest band in the world… heres why i was wrong
by dorkin I came to the drawing board with an edgy idea to figure out who would replace T Hawk of the Foo fighters after his tragic death. Turns out, no one here cares. I thought I had a superiority… Read More ›
let me cut to the chase… what the fuck is small talk
by matquintinmcgotty Picture this: waking up at 10 am for a class whose homework you completed 2 bowls in, reposting a weed whacking ad you misread as an infographic against unruly marijuana charges, walking to class to the worst… Read More ›