burlington skunks tied in with owl city

by d.orkin

Late night walks were essential in the age of high Covid. The only respite from the claustrophobic interior was the great outdoors. The glorious view from outside Simpson Dining hall was beckoning me into that great old forest. But when the average folk go to sleep, the creatures of the night emerge. If we walked back at the right time, we would find these creatures on patrol. “Don’t get too close, it may spray you,” I would say to my companion. And I prayed that some misguided student wouldn’t take that advice, and head directly into the storm, screwing all of us up in the process. 

A few issues ago, a fellow staff writer and I paid our tribute to Owl City, the myspace sensation that brought us sanctuary in the darkest moments of our childhood. We thoroughly explained the artists’ magnum opus and what it meant to us years later as college students with a developed knowledge of art and culture. And in the hour of the skunk, perhaps we can revisit this optimistic body of work that brought us so much joy back then, and we can arm our students with something stronger than animal control: love. 

Nestled behind the Trinity campus is the skunks nest that is usually referred to as the back five, and this is where I witnessed my fair share of the skunks that call the region home. Their fur coating is camouflage prepared, similar to that of an ROTC student on a second Wednesday of the month. But those two white stripes give it away. If you return after a long night out and you see movement, but cannot observe the exact source, chances are you ran into our friend. The other creature you may find are the raccoons, but this was already covered in our paper, and not much more is to be said, except that they have meetings with the skunks every Monday after class. And this is where the music comes in. Monday night in the nocturnal rodent world is the Owl City appreciation club meeting.

These creatures of the night love owls, the archetype for their system. In recent years, there hasn’t been the owl appreciation within society as they would have hoped, and for night owls, morale is low, especially with all the health nuts claiming that missing sleep is “not healthy” and “will make you sick.” But raccoons and skunks are not concerned because, after all, they sleep during the day. To them, owls must return to popular culture and Owl City is the chance they got for that to happen. In these meetings they go in depth into each song off of the first two owl city albums, and spend time in silence lamenting the downfall that their favorite artist turned towards after becoming uninspired during fame. But to these animals, they could listen to the same few songs over and over and not get bored because their brains are very small. This music is the only thing they need. It has become a kind of religion, the worship of the owl and its gift to society. 

And they said I couldn’t do it. But I married the theme of skunks and racoons to an older article about an even older song album. That’s just the power of music and journalism.

Categories: April Fools 2023, d.orkin

%d bloggers like this: