the tale of a man & his special master

by bs

On September 5th it was announced that Donald Trump received a US district judge’s approval to have a Special Master step in to review “his” documents. So what the fuck does that actually mean? A Special Master is someone appointed to decide whether the documents being investigated have the right to attorney-
client privilege. Trump has alleged that these documents contain confidential information related specifically to interactions between him and his legal team, and as a result the Justice Department should not even be able
to see them. The Special Master is someone with the special privilege to look at the documents and then say to the prosecution “yeah sooooo you can’t read these”.


The documents in question are part of a haul of documents seized by the FBI when they raided Trump’s resort in Mar A Lago this summer. The documents were illegally being stored in the basement, office, etc., of the resort, after Trump brought them there. Weird thing to do for a guy who can’t read. So what if the Special Master reads the documents and says that some are confidential? Nothing.
What if the Special Master reads the documents and says that some aren’t confidential? Nothing. This is a ploy to slow shit down so that Trump can maybe avoid the consequences of his dumbass actions.

Trump’s three charges are likely to be as follows: unauthorized possession of national defense information (10 years prison per document), illegal concealment of documents (3 years per document) and illegal destruction of documents (20 years per document). At the moment, the running count on docs is: 38 classified, 5 confidential, 16 secret, and 17 top secret. That’s like…uh…idk at least 10 years.

So what if the investigation gets slowed down? That’s American justice baby! Trump is holding out for some more ridiculous scandal than this, perhaps hoping he’ll get shot in the head in a convertible. The most American part of all this though, even if Trump gets fucking arrested, he can still campaign from jail.



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