I love my mom but holy fuck someone needs to take her apple watch

by katlipari

Believe me, I love my mom, she’s great! I can easily say, best mom I’ve ever had, no complaints! But if I had to complain, I would. And that would be my problem with her Apple Watch. Ever since she got an Apple Watch for Christmas my life has become insufferable. For those of you who are privileged enough to have a mom that does not own an Apple Watch you are free of the daily pinging that my mom does on her watch to find her iPhone. I’ll admit, I’ve used the feature before, in fact it is pretty handy, if you lose your phone you can ping it from your watch. However, such a feature should not be taken advantage of, it should not be used daily nor should it be used multiple times in one day. I propose that maybe, just maybe, there is a deeper issue if you have to ping your phone upwards of 5 times a day.

Funny enough, before I got a phone my parents were worried I wasn’t responsible enough, that I’d lose it or crack it or whatever. Well! I have done nothing of the sort, but my mom sure has, one time she even threw her phone into the trash at the dump. No amount of pinging can bring that phone back. My dad has also cracked his phone and dropped into some body of water, I can’t quite remember where, but then again that’s not really important is it? But let me know why they both got new phones on my birthday… rude right? Like, you couldn’t wait a month? 

Recently I went home for the weekend due to strep throat and I was met with that dreaded pinging sound…three times in one day. I wanted to shout “it’s on the dining room table” because it only makes sense that I would know where it was, while I was all the way upstairs in my room… But alas I couldn’t shout because I was sick and thus I had to endure three rounds of pinging. When I am at school I think I have escaped it, but my comedian of a father decided to record my mom using that wretched feature and send it to me as a silly little joke. Everytime she does it she does this little giggle because it’s soooo funny to her, frankly I’ve had enough, but what can I do?

Circling back to my love for my mom I fear that there may be no solution for this, over my dead body will she have one of those god awful phone holster things. She may have trouble keeping track of her phone, but she still has her dignity and she can’t ping that.

Categories: April 26, kat lipari, water cooler

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