the argument for early risers.

by danelibler

So what.

So what I enjoy the simple qualities of life. 

I like the silence and pace of early mornings. I like not only the acceptance but the insistence on coffee.

And I like the hope. Goddamn, I love the hope. The first morning hit of possibilities; a hope headrush like no other. For best results, I inhale deeply 3 times, snap my neck, so that my head at a 90-degree angle helicopters my limp bound around my room. I then descend smiling in an epic powerstance.

I am ready for the day.

I think me, a Thoreau, in complete solitude if I could only just beat the rush. No one to email, no one to call, to IM, DM. No one to run into, no one to watch me down the street.

But the single best argument for why some nightcrawlers should think twice before calling me daylight square,

Shut up.

I have endless re-do’s. Like Adam Sandler in the critically and amateurly acclaimed comedy, Click. I have the power of time on my hands. What did I do this morning… I don’t know, wake up at 7, kill a man, go through the local circuit courts, get dismissed, then the case is picked back up by SCOTUS to determine a civil rights precedent.  In a 8/1 vote, I was convicted, sent to the same cell as Eileen Wuornos, legally euthanized in the name of justice, and risen again in a cave enclosed by a boulder. My lover Mary Magdalene sobbing for me.

And after all that I went to check the time and it read 8:30 in the morning. See, no matter how badly you may “fuck up”, if you do it early enough, it’s as if your mistake never happened.

We are humans. we make mistakes. Some of us more than others. If you belong to the latter community. Heed my argument for the early risers. And start fucking up before noon. 

Categories: dane libler, mar 1, trash

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