you can’t get there from here

by jayceslesar

Listen, if you think about it, there shouldn’t be any roads in the contiguous United States that aren’t connected in at least some way to any other road, unless you live on some military-esque compound or some cult (is there a difference?). And I’ll be honest, I don’t even drive that often as I get enough of a rush from Mario Kart but come on, getting to other places in this state is hot garbage. First of all, the only roads that matter are Route 7, 89, and Spear Street, if you disagree, you are from out of state or live in a part of Vermont that is irrelevant. This was actually the answer to the first question on the multiple choice test to earn my learners permit.

Ok but actually it is messed up. Get this: if I wanted to drive to Maine (I wouldn’t be driving though my friend would tbh) I have to go so far south it hurts. I gotta sit in a car on my phone to go further away from my destination than I was originally to reach it. Fake. You could go the back way which is shorter in distance but it is less highway so it actually takes longer. Hello?? What the hell?? What a waste of infrastructure to not just blow up a highway through the mountains! It is so discouraging to have to go so far out of my way that it makes me not want to travel. Anti-tourism.

Now, circling back to the important roads in Vermont, I may be biased granted I haven’t lived off of a dirt road in over 10 years, but that’s the benefit of living on one of the important roads. Never again will I be forced to drive over a covered bridge on my daily commute, I choose when I drive over covered bridges now, like an adult. As I mentioned previously, the three important roads are all you need because they can bring you anywhere, even if the only places to go these days are the grocery store and a handful of other excursions. Here’s a quick VT road tier list:

  1. Spear Street: It goes north, it goes south, pretty good’
  2. I-89: It also goes north and south, can go a little faster, doesn’t go east or west 🙁
  3. Route 7: North and south as well, passes through some pretty baller towns, has some pretty baller things to do off of it. The only downsides are the many traffic lights.

      Honorable Mentions:

  • Irish Hill Road: Pretty fun drive, usually good conditions
  • Dorset Street: Has Trader Joes

      Dishonorable Mentions:

  • Pine Street (mostly just the potholes like come on)
  • Old Kmart parking lot: this thing was wack, it was like a Picasso painting for real

So, as this rant comes to an end, and if it didn’t make sense because you are an out of stater, that’s fine, just know your place going forward, or at least which roads are important.

Categories: february 22 2021, jayce slesar, review

%d bloggers like this: