an interview with @uvmknuctats

by kelseydeemer


UVM twitter is a boisterous community of users specializing in what I can describe offbeat and exhaustingly unique humor. On February 23rd a noteworthy account became a part of the mix. Pumping out tweets at an impressive rate I thought only a bot could be behind twitter user @uvmknuctats. But no bot could have this mind, this caliber and complexity of thought. They format their tweets as knuckle tattoos are traditionally formatted, with one letter per knuckle and four knuckles per hand (excluding thumb knuckles). For example, a knuckle tat that reads “BURRITOS” would be formatted on @uvmknuctats as “BURR ITOS”. Their creative mind runs absolutely rampant with absurd knuckle tats. Their mind is simply divine. I sat down with @uvmknuctats to pick their brain and uncover who can be behind this comedic mastermind. 

Hi, @uvmknuctats, how are you?

NOTG REAT

Just how many knuckles do you have?

INFI NITE

How did you come up with the concept of knuckle tattoo twitter?

KNUC TATS

ARE4 EVER

SEEN ONUR

HAND SAND

SEEM VERY

SERI OUS2

THOS EWHO

HAVE THEM

THIS MEAN

MEAT BALL

ISFU NNY!

BCUZ DOES

NOTC ARRY

SAME WGHT

What is your preferred knuckle tat font?

KORN FONT

What is your favorite knuc tat tweet that you’ve thought of?

TOPT HREE

HALF

TEEN POPE

CUM? CUM!

Do you ever go boxing?

SQUA REUP

Do you think your boxing would be improved with knuckle tats?

OFCO URSE

FEAR ISMY

BEST FRND

The saying goes “a picture is worth a thousand words”. How many words is a knuckle tat worth? 

ONEO RTWO

GENE RALY

SOME TIME

THRE ECAN

WORK

Would you use your knuckle tats to strategically cheat on a test?

07/4 1776

y₂ – y₁  x₂ – x₁ 

09/1 1939

Scenario: your knuckle tats say something like “BITC HASS” or “FUCK FUCK” or some other combination of swear words. Someone exclaims “you fist bump your mother with those knuckles?” How do you respond?

DROP DEAD

Have you ever tried to do the concept of knuckle tats but with painting the letters on your fingernails? (you should if you haven’t)

GOOD IDEA 

WANT AJOB

Would you ever consider getting knuckle tats on your toes?

NOCH ANCE

CANT RUIN

FEET PICS

Can you tattoo “BERN 2020” on my knuckles sometime this week?

NOCA NDO!

STAY HOME

DEFW OULD

ANYO THER

TIME BUT!

WONT BCOF

PAND EMIC

How do you feel about fingerless gloves?

LIKE THEM

VERY COOL

How do you feel about normal gloves (nonfingerless gloves)?

THEY OKAY

LESS COOL

How would you go about knuckle tats for a centipede? Would you be up for the challenge? They have so many knuckles.

DONT THNK

THEY HAVE

ANYK NUCS

JUST LEGS

If you were to tat your knuckles permanently what would you choose?

BALL SACK

THEN WITH

KNUC KLES

DOWN ONMY

BALL SACK

Could you give a word of wisdom to UVM twitter?

FOLL OWUS

PLEA SE!!

VOTE BERN

STAY SAFE



Categories: 8, kelsey deemer

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